No Wall Street Mother
I don't want to be a Wall Street Mother. WSMs make a lot of money, keep crazy hours, traverse the globe, and give up a lot of time with their families. I have no desire to earn that much money or reach the top of the ladder if it means I miss out on back-to-school night, class trips and occasional play dates. Some might say I'm not ambitious. I think I just want to be happy.
The problem with this article about Wall Street Mothers is that it is just more of the same - sacrificing all to get to the top - except this time they are highlighting women at the top instead of men. The women succeeding on Wall Street are the ones that have husbands that stay home full time. That shouldn't be a surprise to anyone. Managing an intense career would be a hell of a lot easier if you were free to focus on work and not experience the constant pull from home and family - whether you are a man or a woman. Success requires immense hard work and dedication, of course. But does it have to come with complete sacrifice of any and all life balance?
Update: some interesting responses to this article...
I'm happy to see that there are increasing numbers of women with husbands supporting their careers full time, especially in a male-dominated profession like finance. But I wish there were more examples of the middle ground - happy families with two successful, working parents.
Both my husband's and my own career would benefit from having a spouse at home to manage daily family life. The possibility of that becoming a reality is slim to none for both of us. While there are many aspects of our domestic life I would gladly hand over to someone else (grocery shopping, housekeeping, laundry!), there are many I would not want to hand over (birthday party planning, sending holiday cards, cooking - though I'd give up the dish washing in a second).
If I had enough money, I guess I could pay someone to do all the things I don't care to do and this would free up time for my career. In lieu of said money, paying more attention to my priorities and letting go of the things that suck up time and don't really matter in the big picture is another strategy.
Lists are forming in my head. Priorities are coming into focus...stay tuned!
In the meantime, what daily tasks would you gladly turn over to someone else if you could? Which ones would you keep?
The problem with this article about Wall Street Mothers is that it is just more of the same - sacrificing all to get to the top - except this time they are highlighting women at the top instead of men. The women succeeding on Wall Street are the ones that have husbands that stay home full time. That shouldn't be a surprise to anyone. Managing an intense career would be a hell of a lot easier if you were free to focus on work and not experience the constant pull from home and family - whether you are a man or a woman. Success requires immense hard work and dedication, of course. But does it have to come with complete sacrifice of any and all life balance?
Update: some interesting responses to this article...
I'm happy to see that there are increasing numbers of women with husbands supporting their careers full time, especially in a male-dominated profession like finance. But I wish there were more examples of the middle ground - happy families with two successful, working parents.
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| I bet Wall Street |
Both my husband's and my own career would benefit from having a spouse at home to manage daily family life. The possibility of that becoming a reality is slim to none for both of us. While there are many aspects of our domestic life I would gladly hand over to someone else (grocery shopping, housekeeping, laundry!), there are many I would not want to hand over (birthday party planning, sending holiday cards, cooking - though I'd give up the dish washing in a second).
If I had enough money, I guess I could pay someone to do all the things I don't care to do and this would free up time for my career. In lieu of said money, paying more attention to my priorities and letting go of the things that suck up time and don't really matter in the big picture is another strategy.
Lists are forming in my head. Priorities are coming into focus...stay tuned!
In the meantime, what daily tasks would you gladly turn over to someone else if you could? Which ones would you keep?
Cleaning, cooking, laundry, grocery shopping, and taxi service.
ReplyDeleteAlthough dropping off and picking up the kids, does give us valuable talking time. Some days it can be a little overwhelming!
what would I keep? Having dinner together, homework monitoring, shopping for clothes or birthday presents. I would have a hard time being someone who travels for their job. I really enjoy being home in the evenings, I like to be there in case they need something. I miss out on the mornings, Dwayne gets them to school, so I don't get to see what they wear, and the hustle and bustle of the mornings. But it is a trade off!
Just returning to work has altered my perspective greatly. The drudgery of repetitive domestic duties isn't my only option during the day, and I LOVE THAT! I learned over the course of a two year stint as stay-at-home mom that I am not cut out for it. I tried so very hard to ignore my inner despair at feeling trapped at home, at the expense of my mental health. I know that a mother comes in every shape and form, and we give everything we can for our kids. We question and doubt ourselves relentlessly. We are so hard on ourselves because we think we should be experiencing some kind of fulfilled nirvana wherever we are. I don't agree that balance is possible, rather we find the path that works best and transition through phases of life. Happiness is found in daily perspective and gratitude and...thanking yourself for being a good parent. :)
ReplyDeleteI love this perspective! You are absolutely right and goes back to the whole grass is greener thing we've discussed previously. I am very curious to hear how you are adjusting - the good and the bad! Perhaps a guest post...?? :)
DeleteHmm, that would be fun! I'm a adjusting back to work quickly, I think because it was a long overdue change. It reaffirmed that I'd made the right decision, and I feel so much better about daily life now that the challenges of a career are involved. It'll be interesting to see how that sustains in another year... fingers crossed. ;)
ReplyDelete