A letter to Charlie
I am so proud of you! You did it - you are now officially a kindergartner. Your first day could not have gone any better. Daddy thought we would be late, but we were way early. We even had time to play on the playground before going to your class. That was fun. You were a total champ this morning and only got a little nervous as we were leaving and that was probably only because Mommy was crying. I was a complete mess. I told you I would cry and there was nothing I could do about it. But you were brave and that made me brave, too.
I worried about you all day long, though I shouldn't have. You didn't even need to take your family picture out of your backpack because you weren't sad. I wondered who you sat next to in the cafeteria and if you ate all of your lunch. Did you fall asleep at rest time? I thought about you and wondered if you remembered the hand sign that meant you had to go to the bathroom and if you would have gym or music on your first day. Did you make a new friend? From what I could tell the highlights of the day were when the Principal pulled a quarter out of a kid's ear at lunch time, playing at recess, seeing your Berkley friends in the hall, and picking out a prize from the class Treasure Chest. If there was a low point, it was probably at snack time in after care. You couldn't open your string cheese and were too nervous to ask a new friend or teacher for help so you threw it away. That makes my chest hurt to hear, but I know that in no time you will feel confident enough to ask anyone at school for help. If that is the worst thing that happened on your first day of school, I think we can live with that.
We spent the last week together waiting for kindergarten to start. Every day, just you and me. We went to the grocery store, played baseball, went to Mommy's work, rode bikes, and had a blast at World's of Fun. I really enjoyed just hanging out with you and that made it even harder to be away from you today. It felt like the longest. day. ever.
The highlight of my day today was picking you up from school. When you saw me your whole face lit up and you gave me the best, biggest hug. And you were tired, but happy, and I just wanted to wrap you up and hold you so you could sleep for a little while. Tomorrow is only your second day of school and I really want to be the one to pick you up and see your face light up, feel that giant hug. But I can't. Mommy is getting an award at work, a really nice one. You would be proud of me! And here's the thing about working mommies, we're always having to make tough choices. Tomorrow I have to be at work and I can't pick you up, but you will be just fine. You will be excited to have Grammy pick you up and show her your new school. And I will get many, many more chances to pick you up and hear about your day. If this letter still exists in cyberspace someday or on my computer when you are old enough to read it, I just want you to know that I wanted to be there with you. You are my everything.
Ok, time for mommy to go to bed. I'm exhausted and feeling entirely too weepy. Just know that I love you and you make me proud every second of the day.