I started this blog 6 years ago when I was still pregnant with Charlie. It has been many things to me over the years, most importantly a place where I can think out loud. Motherhood can be completely overwhelming and I found myself unprepared for the onslaught of new information, skills and knowledge I would need to be a parent. No matter how excited you are to become a parent, no matter how many years you dream of the day it will happen, there is no way to prepare yourself for the role. This blog became my outlet for all that was mysterious, interesting, challenging and rewarding about motherhood.
I've written about the fright we had when Charlie entered this world, making my own baby food, and finding time to exercise. I've posted favorite recipes, shared my working mom struggles, the fun aspects of my work, as well as my views on cooking, nutrition, and exercise. I've posted photos from birthdays, vacations, farm table dinners, weekends around the city, our home remodel, major life milestones and everything in between. Writing about all these things made me feel connected, a part of the bigger parenting universe. Writing down my experiences made them resonate for me, and hopefully for a few others. It makes me happy to know friends (and some strangers) enjoy reading my blog. But in the end, I write for myself and how it makes me feel, reflect and remember.
This isn't a good-bye to the blog. I'm not done with this space, but I do feel like something has shifted. We've entered the world of elementary school and it is a completely different place from where we've been for the past 5 1/2 years. It is all new and a tad overwhelming right now, but it is not entirely foreign. School is something I know! I was in one school or another for more than half of my life, and I am still in a learning environment (remind me to write about how first year medical students are similar to kindergartners!).
(Dare I say it?) I am growing more confident about this whole parenting thing lately. The classroom, the field, learning, standardized tests, setting goals, making friends, teamwork - these topics are not as scary and unfamiliar to me as sleep schedules, breast feeding, and teething. I am starting to believe I have something to offer my children and it doesn't have anything to do with Pinterest-worthy parties or homemade crafts.
I'm not sure what this means for the blog or what the blog will be when it grows up. My kids are growing up too, and I don't want to post things here they wouldn't want the world to see. I might have to experiment with this space for a while and see what feels right. I'm not ready to lose this outlet entirely, it still means too much to me. Stay tuned!